Day 3

Early breakfast to get to the Tourist information for 8.45pm for "Bubbles Tours".The company, not unsurprisingly, wanted to call the business champagne tours but the authorities who are fiercely protective of the name champagne did not allow them to use the word "champagne". Personally I think Bubbles Tours is an excellent description. Our guide Amanda was extremely informative and enthusiastic as we drove around Reims, often with no hands on the steering wheel, to illustrate a particular point.

We arrived at Mumm Champagne House and had our first tour of the day. The guide was very soft spoken and some of the party had difficulty hearing his commentary. The initial introduction to Mumm was a set of pictures illustrating the champagne process which I found much classier than the Moet extravaganza. The tour was informative and Mumm had displayed many visual aids to show the development of the champagne process. By 10.30 we had our first glass of champagne in our hand - a choice of brut or demi sec. I chose the demi-sec and found it agreeable at that time of the morning. The obligatory shop stop followed but again they were happy for you to wander about with your glass in hand unlike Moet where they were rushing people through.

Our next stop was the Reims Cathedral. I said to the girls that I was "cathedraled" out after a recent visit to Lucca and Ely (where the cathedral is amazing! I would highly recommend it. The best interior of a cathedral ever.) When I saw the cathedral I was bowled over by the size and the decoration. It is bigger than Notre Dame in Paris. The novel "Pillars of the Earth" by Ken Collett, recommended by my cycling buddy has brought the whole building process of churches to life for me and I was excited to find lots of flying buttresses in Reims. I had not realised that most of the French kings had been crowned in Reims starting with Clovis. The stained glass windows in one area of the cathedral had been commissioned by the champagne houses and show the champagne producing process.
The exhibition of the restoration of the cathedral after the world wars clearly showed the devastation and German visitors to Reims would be constantly reminded of the wars and their consequences.

We then drove out into the country to visit the Co-operative .The harvesting had started and grapes were arriving and being weighed, then thrown into the enormous vats. We saw the juice pouring out of the presses and tasted the first pressing. The second and third are used for other wines but not champagne.
We saw all the riddling machines and how the whole process is now very mechanised. There were a few oak barrels about but generally the metal containers are used for the fermentations process.

Day 2 continued.

12.30pm Three glasses later of the excellent and varied Collard Picard champagnes it was time for lunch.
Croque Monsieur and rose wine go very well together. Again the whole restaurant was jumping. It must be the smell of the champagne in the air. Sadly no time to actually visit Eperney centre as the Moet tour was about to start.

Stunning surroundings, very grand and the tour guide was from Hong Kong. The introductory video was hysterical. It would have been better to put it in French with subtitles as it sounded ridiculous in English. Imagine Nigella Lawson with a glass of champagne - yugh!
Miles and miles of cellars. The champagne process was described. The riddling to get rid of the sediment. How Veuve Cliquot invented a machine to turn the bottles. Dom Perignan, the monk who accidently discovered how to make champagne.
The different "Cru" =these are the villages around the Champagne region. Some are Grand and Petit Cru and again it is strictly controlled how much and when they can produce. Terroir is an important word in Champagne production. The area has to be just right. The vines are on hillsides. The drainage has to be just right and the soil not too fertile so the vines have to dig deep for nourishment. The soil in the Champagne region is chalky and the walls of the caves are cold and damp to touch which gives a steady temperature.
During the wars all the schools and hospitals and living quarters were in the cellars.

Disappointing tasting session as it was all a bit rushed and two glasses were thrust into your hand. So different from earlier in the boutique house. Explanations about the champagne were also very brief.
Nora rushed off to buy some glasses from Collard Picard and I think Moet miss out by not making the experience more relaxing at the end. No one was buying in the shop and talking to Koreans and Australians they also felt disappointed. As a bottle of Moet is drunk every second and they sell 30 million each year I don't supposed they are bothered. It is part of a conglomerate which owns  Louis Vuitton and Veuve Cliquot so they are probably not interested in feedback from the masses. To cope with the demand for Moet The company buy bottles from co-operatives and then add their own sugar and blends.
Train back to Reims, on time luckily. We had planned to eat in Flo a very expensive restaurant but as we were "champagned" out we decided on a cheaper version in the square. We had rose and red wine with our meal which was eventful towards the end with a person suffering from mental health issues being escorted off by the police after a lot of discussion. This meant that another nightcap in the Latino bar was required to settle the stomach. Very smooth Calvados here and good music. Absolutely fantastic day.

Day 2

Surprisingly we all slept well and some made it to breakfast. I can highly recommend the hotel although why anyone has a pool which is too deep to stand up in beats me. You also need your room cards to activate the lifts. This is the first time I have come across this and it would be useful if receptionists told you about it instead of waiting like idiots for the the lift to arrive.
Train to Eperney - after a week in Tuscany where the trains ran like clockwork - we were disappointed to find a forty minute delay but it gave us time to appreciate the amazing station restaurant decorated with bottles of champagne.

photo of restaurant

The tourist information here is small but the girl was helpful. The countryside and vineyards are amazing and because of the time of year hanging with bunches of ripe grapes. The picking had started in some areas. Everything is controlled and the villages are told when they can start the harvest. 100,000 extra workers come to pick the grapes for two weeks. (I have applied for employment next year!)
The train was smooth and clean with picture windows so you had a superb view of the countryside. As we approached Eperney the site of the champagne houses was impressive. The huge "Castellane" tower seemed symbolic. Our first glass of champagne in the region. We walked through the Hotel de Ville park. The flowers had a purple theme and were stunning.
We hit the hallowed ground of the Avenue de Champagne. We came face to face with Moet. and then it just continued until we reached the champagne cork roundabout. We walked the street in reverent silence being in the presence of greatness.  The beautiful courtyards were calling to us and the Moet Disneyland pulled us in though the gate promptly shut behind us. We thought we might have to spend the day behind bars but some kind person who had us on video released us. Phew! 1

2pm time for tasting.

 We entered a little boutique champagne house called Collard Piccard  and had a three glass tasting for 12 Euros. The girl was delightful and explained the nuances of the champagne. We sat in the beautiful courtyard with the sun beating down and realised that this was a special moment, Life didn't get much better with three like minded friends (by this time Sue and I were insulting each other like old buddies!-she had already been awarded the plonker award but what "goes on tour stays on tour!")

Day 3 continued

Time for lunch. Charles Heston has just built a purpose built tasting building and we had a superb lunch accompanied by the different wines. L'Agat - blanc de noirs - mostly the Pinot noir grape fruity and nutty.
Photo
We bought a case of this as we all enjoyed it immensely. Next came "Selection Chardonnay" made from 100% Chardonnay grape. Most of the champagnes we tried were a mixture of Pinot, Meunier and Chardonnay grapes so the single grape vintages were always interesting. We accompanied these wines with a scallop seafood starter. For the guinea fowl (pintade) we tried the Coteau Champenois which is the red wine made from the second pressings of the grapes. It is a mixture of Pinot Noirs and Meuniers grapes and produced in oak barrels. It was a very agreeable light wine with hints of cherry and vanilla. it is said to be the red wine preferred by women but we were not totally convinced.

To accompany the dessert we had the "selection rose" which is produced from the oldest vines and can be served as an aperitif or with a fruity dessert, again according to the brochure -"pour le plus grand plaisir des femmes."  We did feel that there was a lot of sexism in the champagne brochures. Could it be that we women drink the majority of champagnes produced? We were not provided with those statistics. Finally the dessert itself was made from the special pink biscuits of the region and the custard had been doused in "Ratafia" a sweet wine made from the grape juice and alcohol.
By this time we were behind schedule and fairly mellow so after some frantic shop buying we jumped in the minibus (now best buddies with the two other group members - Sue had been exchanging insults with the poor solitary gentleman in our group -making for some lively lunch conversation in between the explanations and pouring of champagne).

The next stop was a boutique champagne house Roger Coulon. We did a perfunctory tour then straight into the wine tasting. Another two champagnes. The first one Anna described as having the taste of petrol or creosote but perhaps unfair after the amount we had already consumed. The second glass of a "non-dose" champagne i.e no sugar added was delicious so we purchased that one. I think I would always prefer the "non-dose". It is quite frightening when you realise how much sugar is added to some champagnes although they all insist that they keep it to a minimum.
As you can imagine the journey back to Reims was either going to be extremely quiet which Amanda said was normal or in our case lively. There were no "headages" at this stage - you had to be there! I tried to convince the girls that the best way to learn the language is through song so we sang "Meunier, tu dors.." but the language was too complex so back to "Un kilometre a pied" Please excuse all the lack of accents throughout. I don't know how to do them on my new Google Chromebook yet.) Luckily Reims appeared before we got through too many verses. Due to our purchases Amanda took us to the hotel door. We had a fantastic day and can highly recommend Bubbles Tours.
I decided on a swim, the others chilled and then we decided to explore some restaurant recommendations away from the main drag. We saw some very bizarre street performances and then wandered past the Veuve Cliquot champagne House and found Les Halles - a very good area to dine. We opted for the rose wine and the waitress countered "but it is not sunny" and shrugged her shoulders in typical French fashion. These mad English women (actually three Scots but hey we don't have the vote!)
We were sitting next to a bottle of Billycart Salmon champagne. Our guide had said that was her favourite champagne. It seemed like fate. It was our final glass in France. Nectar.
We travelled back the next day and finished off an amazing trip with fish and chips and a glass of Moet.
That is living. Champagne does not generally keep beyond three years before it starts losing its bubbles so make sure you don't keep your bottles too long.
Thank you girls for an amazing few days.

Day 1
The two and a half hour journey to Reims flew by punctuated by another coffee stop. We were all starting to hallucinate about that first glass of champagne. I nearly killed the girls trying to get into the car park but in my defence it really should not have been a two way street and we were distracted by the site of our Hotel de la Paix - a lovely Best Western Hotel -perfectly situated in the centre of Reims and the amazing monument on the corner of the Rue Buirette.

Picture of monument

Having survived the journey and car parked safely for the next few days we hit Reims. Bottle one - upgrade from the 30 Euro advertised on the menu to a Castellane -selling at 40Euros. Beautifully presented I had to taste the first drop. Yes, that would be acceptable and then "le pouce dans le cul de la bouteille" the champagne was poured, not into flutes, but beautiful little glasses which keep the bubbles in but allow you to smell the aromas. (Only Moet et Chandon had the traditional flutes but more about that later.)

The Castellane lasted 20 minutes if that. I felt it was a depressive champagne as we all became a bit melancholy after this one after the initial euphoria of the first taste. We moved on to the appropriately named Cafe de Reims where Anna succeeded in insulting the waiter by asking him to make sure that the champagne was served cold. This was a Vranken champagne from the Demoiselle house -40 Euros so heading up market. Again the same glasses and once we started chatting up the waiter he mellowed and brought us some Biscuits Roses, a speciality of Reims, to have with our champagne. We had intended to eat something at this point but decided to move on.

Bottle three - Taittinger. This hit the spot. We found a delightful restaurant on the main drag. The staff found it hilarious our attempts to pronounce Taittinger properly. We had "amuse-bouches" and Moules and Tartiflette, all of which are perfectly accompanied by Taittinger. We were now back on the giggling champagne and entertaining the multi national clientele in the restaurant.
Time for a digestif in the Latino Bar -Calvados and Cognac and a merengue, the dance not the dessert! Well it is a multi national city!

Decision time

 Still coming to terms with my voluntary redundancy I was sitting in Nora's garden when the words champagne and Reims were mentioned. "I'm booking today", said Nora.  Without deliberation I immediately said, "Can I come too?"  This had been on my bucket list for ages and I couldn't think of anyone better to go with than my two "Pilates buddies". Every Monday evening we sweat for an hour and then pop that cork -regardless whether it is Tesco's basic Ca Va or a special bottle of champagne to celebrate some important life event or simply Monday evening and why not! We giggle and fart our way through the Pilates programme. We are very proud of the fact that we now do the advanced version, although Jennifer our instructor on the DVD is even more smug with her perfect smile and flat stomach. (We do occasionally throw things at the television but so far it has survived.) We have a weigh in and my weight has stabilised over the three years in spite of the added sugar in the fizz.

The prospect of four days in the Champagne region during the week when I should have been teaching for my twentieth September in a row at college was so exciting. Thinking about all those poor colleagues trying to find suitable rooms, boxes of resources and lost students made me feel sorry for them for a few seconds then I moved on.

I volunteered to drive and picked up Nora and Anna and their good friend Sue at some ungodly hour to reach the tunnel for our crossing. M4 and M25 Monday morning don't go there! We live in an over populated area. I love the French Peage. The tunnel is also amazing but a tip -go straight to boarding -miss out on the coffee. We were bumped from our scheduled crossing both there and back as we were near the end of the queue.

The girls got the teacher treatment and were told to keep me "right, right, right" and watch the signs. They were severely reprimanded if they became distracted although it might have been pain I was seeing in their faces as I sang along to Abba, Beautiful South and the Bee Gees all the way to Reims.